Rooted

And I pray that you [and I], being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge- that you may be filled to the measure of all fullness of God. Ephesians 3:17b-19

More Wordless Wednesday

Longing

Earlier this afternoon, I came across a blog entry that I saved last month, I thought, for a friend. Now just a few weeks later, God has used it to speak to me. Though I have felt a bit lost these last few weeks, I know there exists in me a desire for more. A longing to see God's glory again, to feel His presence in my life and in my relationships. I have found much encouragement in the following statements:

"Even if your inner motions are presently sluggish, lethargic, and barren, are they nevertheless not there?--namely, displeasure about your condition, and a desire to be lively in all spiritual exercises... Is not your deadness your greatest burden? Wherever there is feeling there is life. Since you are therefore sensitive to your spiritual deadness, is not this then an indication that you have life?"

Today, I am thankful that God promises to renew us, to fill us with His spirit. I am encouraged knowing He is still at work in my life, even when I don't feel it or understand how. I am also increasingly burdened for the friend I originally saved this blog for. Realizing now how grateful I am to be uncomfortable in my current level of deadness, I feel called to intercede at greater levels for this individual. For far too long, I have seen him struggling to find any desire to draw near to God. So this afternoon, I renew my commitment to pray for an outpouring of God's spirit in both of our lives, a restored connection with God, and a revived understanding of Christ's power.

Create in me a clean heart, O God, And renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalm 51:10
You hide Your face, they are dismayed; You take away their spirit, they expire And return to their dust. You send forth Your Spirit, they are created; And You renew the face of the ground. Psalm 104:29-30
But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. Isaiah 40:31
(You can read the inspiring post here.)

People of His Pasture

Wordless Wednesday (sort of)Psalm 95

O come, let us sing for joy to the Lord, let us shout joyfully to the rock of our salvation.
Let us come before His presence with thanksgiving, let us shout joyfully to Him with psalms.
For the Lord is a great God, and a great King above all gods,
In whose hand are the depths of the earth, the peaks of the mountains are His also.
The sea is His, for it was He who made it, and His hands formed the dry land.
Come, let us worship and bow down, let us kneel before the Lord our Maker.
For He is our God, and we are the people of His pasture and the sheep of His hand. Today, if you would hear His voice,
Do not harden your hearts, as at Meribah, as in the day of Massah in the wilderness,
When your fathers tested Me, they tried Me, though they had seen My work.
For forty years I loathed that generation, and said they are a people who err in their heart, and they do not know My ways.
Therefore I swore in My anger, truly they shall not enter into My rest.

Lord let me be reminded today to keep my heart soft
to you and what you are doing in my life. Though
I may be in the wilderness, you are directing my paths.
May I be ready to let go of my worry and anxiety
and desires in order to enter into your rest.

Campfire Conversations

"Friendship is a strong and habitual inclination in two persons to promote the good and happiness of one another." -- Eustace Budgell (1711)

One of the highlights of this past weekend was sitting outside around the fire with friends, just chatting about random things. Our conversation did turn to dating (no surprise, as all of those who stayed late were single girls). It had been some time since I'd had one of those types of discussions. For the most part, I am enjoying where God has me right now. I love my friends- they keep me grounded and we rarely have a dull moment. I am serving in my local church-where I am both encouraged and challenged. I adore my family- they love me unconditionally and don't pressure me to live up to culture's standards. So it's healthier for me to not dwell on when/if I will marry or what he may or may not be like. But there is something relaxing, dare I say inherently magical about gathering around a fire. Naturally, we began to speak of our hopes and desires for the future. Things we were not willing to compromise on, and secret ways we hoped our husbands would add to our lives. Coming at the end of weekend full of friends and family, I began to realize some previously unknown expectations I have for my future husband. I'm not sure yet if God used this weekend to bring this to my attention in order to affirm them or modify them. But now they are out in the open and can be dealt with and prayed about. I am also starting to understand how amazing these women are that God has put in my life. It is freeing to know how much they love me and that we are all looking out for each others best interests in this area.

Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends. -- Czech. Proverb

"Two are better than one; because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend cam help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up." Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Clumsy

I don't think I have ever been more aware of Paul's struggle expressed in Romans 7. I know what is good, I know what I should not do (or think). But what I do not want to do or think, I do. But thanks be to God who loves me and forgives me through Christ despite my loose halo. I am so grateful that He still continues to hold me and work in me to make me holy as I fall on Jesus. I realize more every day that as much as I may try, as much as I may practice, I simply do not have the capability to change myself. But how humbling...how exciting...how empowering to know He can do more than we can imagine to take our clumsy lives and use them for His glory!

Chris Rice - Clumsy
You think I’d have it down by now
Been practicing for thirty years
I should have walked a thousand miles
So what am I still doing here
Reaching out for that same old piece of forbidden fruit
I slip and fall and I knock my halo loose
Somebody tell me what’s a boy supposed to do?

I get so clumsy
I get so foolish
I get so stupid
And then I feel so useless
But You’re saying You love me
And You’re still gonna hold me
And that You wanna be near me
‘Cause You’re making me holy
You’re still making me holy, yeah

I’m gonna get it right this time
I’ll be strong and I’ll make You proud
I’ve prayed that prayer a thousand times
But the rooster crows and my tears roll down (again)
Then You remind me You made me from the dust
And I can never, no never, be good enough
And that You’re not gonna let that come between us

I get so clumsy
I get so foolish
I get so stupid
And then I feel so useless
But You’re saying You love me
And You’re still gonna hold me
And that You wanna be near me
‘Cause You’re making me holy
You’re still making me holy, yeah

From where I stand
Your holiness is up so high I can never reach it
My only hope is to fall on Jesus

I get so clumsy
I get so foolish
I get so stupid
And then I feel so useless
But You’re saying You love me
And You’re still gonna hold me
And that You wanna be near me
‘Cause You’re making me holy
You’re still making me holy, yeah

Transformed- Romans 12:2

The more I come to know God, the more I hate who I have been and the sin that so easily entangles me. May my growing intimacy with Him increase my desire to be further transformed and my ability to know His will.

Relient K - Who I Am Hates Who I've Been

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Love = Me??

An exercise in my bible study this past week was on 1 Corinthians 13, focusing on the well-known verses 4-8:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

The bible tells that God is love (1 John 4:8), therefore, we could substitute God or Jesus for the word love in these verses. This is a pretty neat word picture. Do it and be encouraged! Then, as we are to become like Christ and to have his attitude, we were to insert our name for the word love. And then to consider which of those phrases made us shudder. Try it.

I am patient, I am kind. I do not envy, I do not boast, I am not proud. I am not rude, I am not self-seeking, I am not easily angered, I keep no record of wrongs. I do not delight in evil, but rejoice with the truth. I always protect, always trust, always hope, always perseveres.

I honestly felt so humbled realizing this is what God would have me to be, and how far I am from it. But this illustration gives me a tangible goal to work toward. And pointed out some specific areas where I am sorely falling short and not bringing honor to God. I will be praying this scripture molds me to his glory!

Forgiveness

I recently heard a couple of radio DJ's discussing a Virginia Tech memorial, one with a marked stone for the each person killed. One of the students added a 33rd stone for the shooter. The sentiment behind it was not to honor his actions, but to remember the life that was lost even if by his own choices. Regardless of his horrifying actions, he will never have the chance to pay for his actions or learn from his mistakes. I cannot imagine how I would feel about this if my family or friends had been among those killed, but from a distance I can see the sentiment. We are called to forgive. Eventually, somehow, with the grace of God, we are compelled to forgive as we have been forgiven. One of the DJ's could not, would not, even attempt to understand. In fact, he added amongst laughter (though with some hesitation only for the trouble he would get in) that his reaction to that 33rd stone was that the shooter "missed one." My heart literally ached at that comment. I may not have chosen to place a stone, I'll hopefully never personally be in a situation to make that decision. But I hope that I will never be so crass as to indicate that anyone deserves what happened to those at Virginia Tech. May I never be ashamed of God's calling to forgive. And may I take this story to heart, increasing my willingness to offer forgiveness whether it is deserved or not. Because I know I have done nothing to deserve my forgiveness.

"Do not judge, and you will not be judged.
Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned.
Forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37

My Isaiah 40:28-31

How could I forget? How could I not realize? The Everlasting God, my Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth does not become weary or tired. His understanding of me, of my situations, of my weaknesses is inscrutable- far too great for me to know. He gives strength when I am weary. He gives me power when I am lacking, when I just cannot go on. Even youths (me and the people I am so tempted to depend on) grow weary and tired, and vigorous people stumble badly.
But (oh, thank you Lord for this small word!) when I wait on the Lord, my strength is renewed. I will mount up with wings like eagles, I will run and not get tired, I will walk and not grow weary. I will survive the times of trials and the desert days.

Being Known

"What matters supremely, therefore, is not...the fact that I know God, but the larger fact which underlies it- the fact that he knows me. I am graven on the palms of his hands. I am never out of his mind. All my knowledge of him depends on his sustained initiative in knowing me. I know him because he first knew me, and continues to know me. He knows me as a friend, one who loves me; and there is no moment when his eye is off me, or his attention distracted from me, and no moment, therefore, when his care falters.

This is momentous knowledge. There is unspeakable comfort- the sort of comfort that energizes, be it said, not enervates- in knowing that God is constantly taking knowledge of me in love and watching over me for my good. There is tremendous relief in knowing that his love to me is utterly realistic, based at every point on prior knowledge of the worst about me, so that no discovery now can disillusion him about me, in the way I am so often disillusioned about myself, and quench his determination to bless me.

There is, certainly, great cause for humility in the thought that he sees all the twisted things about me that my fellow humans do not see (and I am glad!), and that he sees more corruption in me than that which I see in myself (which, in all conscience, is enough). There is, however, equally great incentive to worship and love God in the thought that, for some unfathomable reason, he wants me as his friend, and desires to be my friend, and has given his Son to die for me in order to realize this purpose." from Knowing God

Psalm 139:1-6

O Lord, you have examined my heart

and know everything about me.

You know when I sit down or stand up.

You know my every thought when far away.

You chart the path ahead of me

and tell me where to stop and rest.

Every moment you know where I am.

You know what I am going to say

even before I say it, Lord.

You both precede and follow me.

You place your hand of blessing on my head.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,

too great for me to know!

That I might know you...

Lord, it belongs not to my care
Whether I die or live;
To love and serve Thee is my share,
And this Thy grace must give.

If life be long, I will be glad,
That I may long obey;
If short, yet why should I be sad
To welcome endless day?

I don't know that I've ever heard this hymn by Richard Baxter- it was in Knowing God by Packer, which I've recently begun reading. But that is my prayer today, that like Paul I would desire to know God (Phil. 3:7-10). So much so that nothing else matters. That though I may take up my cross to follow Him, it would never become the decider of my attitude or countenance. I want to know God so fully that I reflect the "joy unspeakable" instead (1 Pet 1:8).

Packer states "those who know their God are sensitive to situations in which God's truth and honor are being directly or tacitly jeopardized." He also plainly challenges our prayers to and praises of God. Daniel demonstrates the prayer of a man who truly knows God. Packer asks if God's "holy majesty, his moral perfection, and his gracious faithfulness keep us humble and dependent, awed and obedient, as it did Daniel?" So today, I am praying that my life and my prayers would show more and more of my desire to know God, greater peace and joy beyond any circumstances and heartaches, increasing energy to pray for God's cause, and further boldness for God's glory to be praised.

Imprecatory Psalms?

We are often told that the writings of David demonstrate a transparent relationship with God. We are challenged to pray honestly- that God desires to have that sort of conversation with us. I had therefore almost disregarded some of the Psalms as that type of encouragement and example for us. Psalms like 55, 69, 79, 109. These, I have learned, are Imprecatory Psalms. They involve David calling down the wrath of God against his enemies, that I can sympathize with occasionally. Recently in fact- but that’s another story. Anyway, with more thought I have wondered how these verses are “God-breathed” and how they mesh with our call to love (and forgive) our enemies.

Then I came across this:
“They [these hard sayings] are not statements of personal vendetta, but they are utterances of zeal for the kingdom of God and his glory. To be sure, the attacks which provoked these prayers were not from personal enemies; rather, they were rightfully seen as attacks against God and especially his representatives in the promised line of the Messiah” (Hard Sayings of the Old Testament, Downers Grove, IL, InterVarsity Press, 1988, p. 172).

So I have been reminded that our God is a God of justice, that He abhors evil. Therefore, it stands to reason that David, who is a man after God’s own heart, is not speaking merely out of cruelty towards his enemies for a personal offense. Instead, David seems to be in tune with God’s sense of justice and intolerance of sin. How great is our God! May I be so in tune with Him that my soul resounds with these reactions to the evil that is so prevalent in this world.